My last post may have been a little bit premature - or, at least, that’s how I was feeling on that day but, as we all know, feelings change. I’ve been feeling a bit fed up for the last couple of days - I had a cold last week and this, and it’s kept me from doing any serious work at the gym, which always dampens my mood. Also, I’ve been dwelling on thoughts on an ex quite recently; we’ve had some contact, exchanged some messages, but she’s not interested in rekindling anything there and, indeed, will be leaving the country fairly soon.
To be honest, I’m not quite sure why I got back in touch. It’s not like we parted on hugely bad terms - we’re still civil, friendly almost. I do care about her a lot, there’s no doubt about that, and I do miss her. But, I suppose, there are reasons why the relationship ended and perhaps those reasons are still valid.
Most of all, I’m just quite lonely. I go for days without seeing anyone. Finding new friends is actually quite tricky when you’re middle aged. I joined a social club in the hope that there would be some activities I fancied going along to but there haven’t been, as yet. There’s not much in the way of a social life in the town where I live - unless you’re twenty years younger and enjoy drinking to excess.
So, I plod on, trying to find work, keeping myself occupied with studies. I’ve done the first part of my TEFL course (the workshop is in August) and I have two more essays to complete before I finish my degree. I suppose I should start thinking about how to dispose of all of my stuff when I finally do leave the country - a combination of trash, giving away and storage, I guess!
